The key ideas

Who Not How: The Formula to Achieve Bigger Goals Through Accelerating Teamwork

Dan Sullivan, Benjamin Hardy, 2020

When you plan something big, the first question that comes to mind is “How do I do this?” Entrepreneur coach Dan Sullivan and psychologist Benjamin Hardy see it as a trap and suggest asking something else: “Who can help me?” The book is about why putting things off is a sign that you need someone else, how to find that person, and how to work with them without smothering them with control.

Who it is for

For anyone used to carrying everything alone who keeps putting off a big goal for months because they don’t know where to start. And for entrepreneurs and managers who should stop doing other people’s work.

If you have enough money to solve a problem, you don’t have a problem.

The best player who couldn’t win alone

Michael Jordan was already considered the best player in the league, yet his first six seasons with the Chicago Bulls ended without a title. The Detroit Pistons double- and triple-teamed him, and whenever he was stopped, the team fell apart. The turning point came when Scottie Pippen, coach Phil Jackson with his team-based offense and a personal strength and conditioning coach joined him. From 1991 to 1998 the Bulls won six championships.

Dan Sullivan, cofounder of the coaching company Strategic Coach, and psychologist Benjamin Hardy see in this story a formula for any big goal. When we plan something beyond our current abilities, the first thing we ask is: “How do I do this?” The authors call it the worst question you could ask, because it locks us inside the limits of our own knowledge and our own time.

A better question goes like this: “Who can help me achieve this?” Next you’ll learn why putting things off is a hint that it’s time to bring in someone else, how to find that person, why they’re worth seeing as an investment rather than a cost, and how not to smother them with control.

Putting things off as a signal, not laziness

The habit of putting things off is usually seen as a weakness, but the authors call it a kind of wisdom. In their view, procrastination, that is, delaying an important task, arises when a goal truly matters to you but you don’t yet have the knowledge or skills for it. You aren’t putting off the goal, you’re putting off the “how” you don’t know.

Tony Caldwell, a client of Sullivan’s, wanted to eat better for years and never got started. The shift came when he changed the question: not “How can I eat better?” but “Who can help me eat better?” The answer was a personal chef. But he didn’t feel like looking for a chef either, and Tony stalled again. Then he asked himself who could find a chef for him. Within thirty seconds he thought of a woman on his team who gladly took on the search, and a few days later a chef was cooking for his family five days a week.

The book’s conclusion: if a task isn’t moving, it isn’t a verdict on your willpower but a sign that you need another person. The authors admit that this step isn’t easy. Asking for help is scary, and your head immediately fills with reasons why nobody will agree.

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About the author

Dan Sullivan and his wife Babs founded Strategic Coach, a company that has been training entrepreneurs for more than thirty years. Benjamin Hardy is an organizational psychologist who writes books on motivation and personal change; he wrote this book based on Sullivan’s ideas.

All books by this author: Dan Sullivan, Benjamin Hardy

Terms from the book

  • Procrastination
  • Jordan
  • Jackson
  • Caldwell
  • Ulrich
  • Pippen: Scottie Pippen, a Chicago Bulls player from 1987 and Jordan’s main partner through all six championship seasons.
  • Strategic Coach: A coaching company for entrepreneurs that Dan Sullivan founded with his wife Babs. The idea of the book grew out of its programs.
  • Hetfield: James Hetfield, singer and guitarist, cofounder of Metallica. He answered Ulrich’s newspaper ad.
  • Metallica: An American metal band founded by Lars Ulrich and James Hetfield. According to the book, it has sold more than one hundred million albums.
  • Selective attention: A property of perception: out of the stream of signals, the mind picks out what seems important and filters out the rest.
  • Impact Filter: Sullivan’s one-page sheet for describing a goal: what you want, why it matters and what the finished result will look like. The author’s own tool, not a scientific method.
  • Castledine: Carl Castledine, a British entrepreneur and founder of Away Resorts, whose story the authors tell in the book.
  • Away Resorts: A British company that runs holiday parks. Carl Castledine founded it in 2013.
  • Sierk: Wes Sierk, an American entrepreneur and former head of Risk Management Advisors, a company he sold in 2019.
  • Banker: Here, an investment banker: a specialist who prepares and carries out deals to sell companies and looks for buyers.
  • Crichton: Michael Crichton, the American writer and author of the novel Jurassic Park, which was made into famous films.
  • Micromanagement: A style of management in which the boss controls every step of the person doing the work instead of judging the result.
  • Nance: Karen Nance, a lawyer from San Francisco and granddaughter of civil rights activist Ethel Ray Nance.
  • Whitmire: Ethelene Whitmire, a historian at the University of Wisconsin-Madison who studies the history of Black women in the United States.
  • Polish: Joe Polish, an American entrepreneur and founder of Genius Network, a community of entrepreneurs.

All terms

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